The Enfolding – A Folk Tale Of Wounding And Healing

One of the problems of describing therapeutic techniques is that they can seem dry and remote. It occurred to me that writing a folk tale would be a good way to talk about the Identity Healing process in a way that spoke to the metaphorical part of ourselves that delights in a story. This tale is one way of telling you about it without talking about it. I hope you enjoy the story and see its potential. – Andy

Holding hands

Image courtesy of Aaron Gilson

In a land far away and long ago there lies a village remote and beautiful.

A scattering of rough stone houses and tangled gardens surrounded by high hills and deep forest.

The villagers lived the simple lives of villagers everywhere.

They worked, slept, laughed, cried, were born and gave birth, grew up, grew old and died in all the ancient and familiar rhythms of the world.

To their occasional visitors they looked the same as villagers everywhere and anywhere.

To those visitors who stayed a while they seemed happier than villagers ought to be.

In spite of the hard work in the daily and yearly struggle for survival these villagers had found a way to be contented with themselves.

The villagers had an easiness of being. A deep contentment with themselves and the world. And although they had all the familiar vexations in their lives, they lived them to the full without struggle.

Children growing here suffered all the usual knocks and blows of life.

If you saw such a moment in a child’s life here you would see all the things you would expect to see anywhere. The shock, hurt, anger or fear would run through their bodies and over their faces.

What you wouldn’t see, what you couldn’t see, if you were not from this village, is the secret way each child protected themselves from their pain.

If you could see it you might doubt your eyes.

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How One Word Can Make Problems Easier To Deal With

This and that

Image courtesy of Paul Downey

Would you rather have your problems right in your face or at a more manageable distance?

Most people would prefer to have room to breathe and think about their difficulties.

When we think, or talk, about the challenges in our lives we tend to focus on the story of the problem. We get sucked in to the difficulty caught in the swirl of thoughts and feelings about the problem.

But there are two words that can make the difference between being gripped by our problem or being able to hold it at arm’s length.

These words are so familiar that you probably never even notice them.

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One Word Tapping – Minimalist EFT

Image courtesy of Chris Haldeman

Image courtesy of Chris Haldeman

One of the problems introducing people to EFT is that after learning the tapping they don’t use it on a regular basis because they can’t figure out how to construct tapping statements.

They don’t know what areas of the stressful situation to focus on and what words to use in their tapping statements.

At the Spring ChangeCamp 2015 I ran an introductory workshop for EFT. I decided to use the opportunity to try out a minimalist approach to tapping to see if it would be possible to have a simple tapping process that beginners would use.

One of the participants said they would be willing to help with the demonstration.

I asked her to think of her stressful situation and give it an emotional intensity score from 0 – 10. She said it was a 9 out of 10.

Then I asked her to describe the situation in just one word.

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EFT Cafe – April 8th – How To Change What You Say To Improve Your Tapping Results

Words

Image courtesy of John Fife

At first glance tapping looks quite simple.

When you feel distress you tap on acupuncture points while saying some words and the distress goes away.

What could be easier?

The tricky part for most tappers is deciding what words to use.

The words are there to direct the tapper’s attention to their experience so that the tapping can ‘get in’ and do it’s work.

But, not all words are create equal.

Some forms of language can help you sooth the distress and others can make that process more difficult. Even when people are already experienced tappers they can use words in ways that gets in the way of progress.

What you say while you are tapping can help or hinder your progress. Sometimes small changes in what you say can make a big difference to your results.

In this month’s EFT Café, Andy Hunt will share 3 ways to help you be more skillful with your tapping language.

The EFT Café is on Wednesday April 8th from 7pm to 9pm at St Oswald’s Hospice Teaching Centre, Gosforth, Newcastle.

Identity Healing – Are Your Younger Selves Suffering?

Younger self

Image courtesy of Emily

If you look at your passport or your driving license you can see your name and your photo. Even if the photo is bad you can tell that it is you.

You appear to be just one person. But is that true?

On the outside you may project an image of calm, capability, or one of the other ways we like to present ourselves to the world. Behind the eyes and beneath the skin it can be a different story.

Have you ever said or heard someone else say?

  • I am not good enough
  • There is something wrong with me
  • I can’t forgive myself
  • Nobody loves me
  • I hate myself

Each of these statements is about an ‘I’,’me’ or ‘myself’. They speak about our identity, who we are.

Beneath what we hope are our socially acceptable exteriors there may be parts of ourselves that are not happy.

These parts: the ‘I’ in “I’m not good enough”, the ‘me’ in “Nobody loves me” and the ‘I’ and ‘myself’ in “I hate myself” are sometimes known as sub-personalities. Sub-personalities are parts of our inner selves that step up and wear the mask of our outer selves.

These parts of ourselves are usually suffering.

The ‘I’ in I’m not good enough is not having a good time.

The ‘me’ in “Nobody loves me” feels distress.

The ‘I’ and ‘myself’ in “I hate myself” are both feeling stressed.

These parts of ourselves are often formed in childhood at times of stress. They carry what they felt, thought and did at that time through life in a capsule of that stress and distress.

You may also remember times when it felt as if a younger part of yourself took control of your adult self. It’s as if you had been hijacked by a terrified child or angry teenager. If you’ve had this experience you have felt the presence of a sub-personality.

It’s bad enough that we can carry these pockets of stress and distress within ourselves, but it gets worse.

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Spring ChangeCamp 2015 – March 28th – Newcastle

Spring ChangeCamp 2015It’s nearly time for the Spring ChangeCamp 2015 on Saturday March 28th in Newcastle.

So far there are 14 presentations for you to choose from at the Spring ChangeCamp 2015 – a mixture of familiar faces and new presenters to ChangeCamp.

Clicking on the links will take you to information about the presentation and the presenters.

An Early Bird fee of £15 applies if you book online before Saturday 14th March, thereafter the full fee for the ChangeCamp event is £25.

A concessionary fee of £10 is available for students and the unwaged.

ChangeCamp has become a very popular event, there are 90 places available for this event, so book on-line to secure your place and prevent disappointment.

Online bookings close on Wednesday 23nd or when the event is fully booked.

If want to know how it all works visit information for ChangeCamp participants.

I hope to see you there.

EFT Café – March 11th, 2015 – Tapping Down Memory Lane

Memories

Image courtesy of Julie ann Johnson

One of the most powerful uses of EFT is as a method for taking the pain out of old memories.

In an EFT Level 1 training I show people how to use the Movie Technique to soften old memories. It’s a great technique but there is often more to difficult memories than meets the (inner) eye.

In this EFT Café we will explore subtle aspects of difficult memories and use that information to make clearing out old memories easier and more complete.

Note: We’ll be practising some approaches to work with unpleasant memories so you will need to bring some with you. Not very bad ones, just memories that you would prefer to remember without stress or distress. Please bring a few of those with you so we have some raw material to work with.

The EFT Café is on Wednesday March 11th from 7pm to 9pm at St Oswald’s Hospice Teaching Centre, Gosforth, Newcastle.