You may have noticed that people can be very annoying, they can do and say things that upset and disturb us.
Wouldn’t it be great if we could reduce that level of annoyance and, as a free bonus, improve our own self-acceptance?
Thanks to Carl Jung and some tapping we can do just that.
Jung suggested (that in spite of all appearances) that which annoys us doesn’t reside in the other person it resides in ourselves.
The other person isn’t doing something intrinsically annoying, we are annoying ourselves at what they are doing.
Of shadows and shoulds
He proposed that the ‘something annoying’ that people are doing illuminates parts of our disowned self, our ‘Shadow’, the parts of ourselves that we can not accept or even acknowledge.
As we grow up we adopt the values and ‘rules’ of our family of origin. These rules (our shoulds) told us what was, or was not, acceptable and how we should behave. As children we absorbed and internalised those rules and expectations. The urge to break those rules had to be suppressed to please and appease those who looked after us.
Now, as adults, thoughts or impulses to ‘break’ those internalised rules are uncomfortable to us, they go against our family and cultural programming. Read more »